Villain Lair on Joralemon St

Saturday, Sep 20, 2008

Day 3 for the R.V. I had big plans today, and they all fell apart... for the better. I planned to drive all the way to a state park near Montauk at the tip of Long Island- that way I could avoid NYC traffic when taking the R.V. back tomorrow morning. Oy vey, I have a new respect for truck drivers in NYC... Google maps also needs a "for trucks" feature.

The plan was to drive from NJ to Staten Island, then onto Brooklyn over the Verrazano Bridge, and then onto the Belt Parkway to eastern Long Island. That fell apart quickly. I was supposed to make a left onto the Belt Parkway at the end of the Verrazano, but it said no trucks! Lucky for me, there was an "Belt Parkway Alternate Route sign" to take 92nd street... or so I thought.

After weaving around Brooklyn side streets for 10 minutes, nearly clipping who knows what with this massive thing, I finally see the sign for the alternate route! Whoops, also no trucks over 10'5". Uhhhh. I parked and fire up the laptop. It turns out parkways are not for trucks -- only express-ways. How could I be so dumb.

So, it was now 4 PM, and the alternate route taking major highways would take another 3 hours. Oof. So I started and I hit the next hurdle. Traffic was killer, and it was Stop & Go. As I was about to get onto I-278, the R.V. stalled! New York is the worst place to have car problems. People need any excuse to honk and scream to reach their daily quotas. I calmed down, gave it a minute and it started again! Yay. The engine probably just overheated from the Stop & Go movements. Then, not more than 3 minutes after that, I'm approaching I-278 and what do you know -- no trucks over 12'! AHHH, it's a friggin interstate highway! I pulled off onto Atlantic Ave and started searching for a parking spot to fire up the laptop once again. I drove around for a few minutes, and finally saw an opening... Pier 3 @ Fulton & Joralemon. This has to be one of the most awesome views of downtown NYC. I guess this is also where art goes to die, because the massive waterfalls they had underneath the Brooklyn Bridge were parked in a construction zone here. They were still flowing... to keep up the morale of the construction workers, I guess?

A nice little Indian security guard assured me I could park here, so I went off urban adventuring (pictures will soon follow).

The funniest thing was as I was walking down on the South side of the street, I saw a small light and pedestrian crossing. What was odd though, was that there was no sidewalk on the North side, just concrete. It turns out the massive concrete wall was a front to the subway, and this was an emergency exit. But why was the pedestrian crossing system necessary for crossing into a big wall? I guess it must trip if the emergency door opens? The funny part was that, as with all pedestrian crossings, there was a button on my side to push to turn the light green. BAHAHAHAHA! I pushed the button, and lo' and behold, the light turned green. Unsurprisingly, the cars stopped, like sheep, even though it was absolutely impossible for humans to be crossing there!

I miss being mischievous.